Love snot? Read Cooking: Mayhip on Snot
Relatively little was known about acquisition methods of this essential ingredient until the publication of Mr. Mayhip’s definitive 5,000 page book, My Life in Snot (exclusively available to Hoxton Street Monster Supplies customers at the special price of £49.99).
Here we tantalise you with a fascinating extract:
"How to harvest snot at peak condition while still runny and fresh (before it turns brittle and crackly) which, as you will appreciate, is a requirement for many recipes? For a long time we were stumped. But then, gradually, everything started to come together.
We found that the most copious, tender, and flavoursome snot came from human toddlers, who often are able supply an almost constant stream. But how to get it? The thrilling answer was – the Invisible Man.
The Invisible Man works most of the time, of course, under cover. But Mayhip happened to bump into him during the resolution of a scandal in Mayfair and after a lengthy negotiation he agreed to work as our principle supplier, except naturally in times of national crisis. It was an astonishing coup for our marketing team, and the beginning of a great partnership.
He soon perfected a technique: as babies were strapped into their buggies for their afternoon walks, he walked with them and, ready with storage bottles and spoon, he eventually learned how to catch each precious drop as they moved. When his bottles were full, he brought the harvest to our kitchens, where our expert chefs were waiting. We got the snot, the kiddies breathed easier, and the Invisible Man had the satisfaction of giving something back to society. As well as a generous stipend."
Problem solved!
To enjoy more of this fascinating history find the book in our store!
